By Benitha Nishimwe
A personal story of faith, patience, and starting over, from Rwanda to California, Maine, and Arizona.
When I came to the United States from Rwanda in 2024, I brought big dreams and a picture of how my new life would unfold.
I was coming as a student, and I was excited about the opportunities ahead. I imagined going to school, finding work, buying a car within two months, and becoming comfortable in my new home.
I expected progress to happen quickly.
Instead, I found myself learning how to get groceries without a car, walking to school in the rain, and wondering how I would manage my responsibilities in a country I was still trying to understand.
There would be progress but not on the schedule I had imagined.
My journey has taken me from California to Maine and, eventually, to Arizona. Each move brought new challenges. Each place taught me something about responsibility, faith, and the patience it takes to build a life.
And I am still learning.
When My Expectations Met Everyday Life
My journey began in California. I was excited to be there, but I soon realized that the cost of living was difficult for me to manage as a student just starting out.
After hearing that Maine might be more affordable, I decided to move. I hoped a different environment would make it easier to establish myself.
But moving did not mean that everything suddenly fell into place.
I was far from home, adjusting to an unfamiliar way of life. Some of the people I expected to help did not support me in the ways I had hoped. That was painful, especially when I already felt nervous and overwhelmed.
Still, I chose not to turn my disappointment into blame. I reminded myself that other people had responsibilities and struggles of their own.
I needed support, but I also needed to learn how to take responsibility for the decisions in front of me.
That lesson became part of my everyday life.
Without a car, grocery shopping required planning. Sometimes I walked through the rain to get to school. Without convenient laundry facilities, even washing my clothes became another task I had to work out.
These might seem like small things. But when you are studying, working, and trying to settle into a new country, they take time and energy.
Then winter arrived.
The cold in Maine made an already demanding routine more difficult. I still had classes to attend, bills to pay, and responsibilities to manage. The weather did not make those responsibilities disappear; it simply made getting through the day harder.
There were days when I wondered how I would manage.
I prayed. I tried to stay patient. And I kept doing what I could.
Eventually, I found a job. When that income was not enough to cover my responsibilities, I found a second one. Balancing work and school was difficult, but gradually, my financial situation became more stable.
Then I reached a milestone that had once seemed far away:
I bought my own car.
I had imagined buying one within two months of arriving in America. It took longer than I expected, but that did not make the achievement any less meaningful.
I knew what it meant to walk to school in the rain. I knew how much effort ordinary errands could require without transportation. Having my own car changed those parts of my daily life.
Later, I was able to rent my own apartment and take care of my expenses.
These were things I had hoped for when I arrived. Reaching them helped me recognize how much I had learned along the way.
Starting Over After Making Progress
After about one year and five months in Maine, I faced another difficult decision.
I had worked hard to establish myself, but I was struggling with the extremely cold climate. I realized I needed to make a change.
That decision scared me.
I had a job, a car, an apartment, and a routine I understood. I knew how much effort it had taken to reach that point. Moving meant stepping away from the familiarity I had built and facing uncertainty again.
I needed to arrange a college transfer, find somewhere to live, look for work, and learn my way around another state.
That is how I ended up in Arizona.
When I arrived, I did not know anyone. I did not know exactly where to begin or how everything would come together.
But I had my faith in God.
I prayed for guidance and began looking for work. It took about three weeks to a month before I found a job. During that time, I worried about how I would pay my rent and what would happen if the search took longer.
What if I don't find a job? How am I going to pay my rent? Where am I going to go?
Those questions were real. Having faith did not mean I never felt afraid.
It meant that, even while I was afraid, I had something to hold on to as I continued looking for work.
Eventually, I found a job and began rebuilding.
Starting over did not feel easy simply because I had done it before. But I was no longer arriving with only expectations. I also had experience. I had already learned how to adapt, manage difficult days, and keep working toward stability.
The Encouragement That Helped Me Keep Going
Throughout this journey, I also found motivation through Facebook and the 8G community.
During some of my hardest moments, reading other people's stories, encouragement, and words of hope helped me maintain a more positive outlook.
Sometimes, I came across a message that reminded me:
“You can still do it.”
There were days when I needed those words.
They did not pay my bills, complete my schoolwork, or find a job for me. I still had responsibilities to face and decisions to make. But encouragement helped me approach those responsibilities with renewed hope.
That is why sharing honest experiences matters to me.
When we only talk about achievements, it is easy to overlook the uncertainty and effort that came before them. Someone might see that I work, study, drive my own car, and support myself without knowing about the rain, the difficult winters, or the weeks I spent worrying about finding a job.
Sharing the fuller story creates room for a more useful conversation—one where we can learn from each other instead of assuming everyone else has life figured out.
I found encouragement in other people's experiences. By sharing mine, I hope to offer that same encouragement to someone who is still trying to find their footing.
What This Journey is Teaching Me
When I look back, the biggest lesson is patience.
I arrived with a timeline for how quickly I thought things should happen. When life did not follow that timeline, I had to learn that slower progress was still progress.
For me, patience has meant continuing to act while accepting that results may take time. I still needed to attend school, look for work, manage my expenses, and make difficult decisions. Prayer and hope helped me continue, but there was also work to do.
I have learned to pay more attention to the practical side of a dream. Housing, transportation, weather, school, and everyday expenses were no longer distant details once I arrived. They became part of the life I had to manage.
I have also learned that becoming more independent does not mean encouragement stops mattering. Taking responsibility for myself and appreciating support from others can exist together.
And I have learned that starting over is not something I need to be ashamed of.
Leaving Maine did not erase what I had accomplished there. I carried those lessons with me to Arizona, even when I felt uncertain about beginning again.
Today, I work. I study. I take care of myself. I am proud of the person I am becoming not because everything is easy now, but because I understand more clearly what it has taken to get here.
There is still more for me to learn and build.
To Someone Who Is Starting Over
Perhaps you are an immigrant adjusting to a new country. Perhaps you are an international student trying to manage school and daily life. Or perhaps your circumstances are different, but you know what it feels like to begin again without knowing how things will work out.
I cannot tell you that our journeys will be the same. I can tell you that mine has taken longer and asked more of me than I expected.
There have been difficult days, but there has also been progress.
Give yourself room to learn. Ask questions. Seek reliable guidance. Be honest about the challenges you are facing, and recognize the steps you have already taken—even the ones other people do not see.
You do not have to be ashamed that building your life is taking time.
I came to America thinking that, within a few months, I would have everything figured out. Instead, I am learning how to be patient, adapt, and trust God while taking responsibility for the next step.
I thought I was coming here to build a life. Along the way, I began to build myself.
This is my story so far. I do not know exactly what the future holds, but I have faith, experience, and hope.
And I am still moving forward.
A Conversation for the 8G Community
Benitha's story invites us to look beyond someone's achievements and understand the effort behind them.
What is one lesson from starting over that you would share with someone facing a new beginning?
Your experience may offer practical guidance or the encouragement someone needs to take their next step.
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